My life is lacking in great stories

I have completely run out of money. My monetary situation is such that I can't even afford cigarettes anymore.

I feel really bad about this, but not because I can't go out to the bar anymore. I feel bad that I have led such a privileged life where not being able to afford to get my nicotine fix constitutes a tragedy. Many of the kids I teach at the school where I have an internship live below the poverty line. There are children who do not have running water or electricity in their homes. There are kids whose parents cannot afford to feed them, and I am complaining about my inability to go out on the town.
Sometimes I really need a reality check.

A few random thoughts

1) Those Girls Gone Wild videos really creep me out. Not because they're pornographic or anything like that, but because they advertise on standard television all the time. It's completely feasible that any one of those girls' fathers, uncles, bosses, etc could be suffering from insomnia when low and behold, there she is, jumping around naked or making out with another girl or masturbating or whatever, for all to see. Don't these girls understand the possible implications of their drunken amateur porn? I would imagine they're not the smartest group of ladies.

2) Upon viewing a commercial for Sybaris Pool Suites, I've developed a new dream. It involves a pool suite and a keg - a party if you will.

3) Famous Dave's BBQ is the least attractive restaurant ever. A romantic date should generally not include bbq sauce all over one's face, picking corn out of teeth or the use of wet naps.