Sunday, April 09, 2006

Nate Franklin's selfish agenda


My friend, Nathan Franklin, has an agenda. It is not your typical selfish agenda, but is as follows:

Nate desires to be related to his friend, a certain Vinnie Bergl. This is not easily accomplished, but could be provided the following conditions came about.

1) Firstly, my younger sister will become Nathan's beautiful and loving wife. This is likely to happen anyway and would make Nathan my brother-in-law. At times in the past, without my sister's knowledge, Nate and I have planned what an awesome open bar they will have.
2a) I will meet, and come to enjoy the company of the aforementioned Vincent Bergl (it is assumed he will enjoy my company as well).
2b) Mr. Bergl will wait around for forever and a day and then maybe stir up the courage to ask me on a date (provided requirement 2a is fulfilled). When previously confided that perhaps this gentleman was not interested in hanging around with me and maybe it is not something that would work out, I was threatened with being shot in the face. It is quite obvious that Nathan means business.
2c) Ultimately, this already planned relationship will lead to an already planned (by Nate) wedding.
3) Vinnie will become the brother-in-law of Nathan and thus, they will be related.

When asked, this plan must come to fruition for one reason only - Nate wants to "go on a lot of trips."
I'm assuming these trips will be of a certain nature. They will be the sort of trips you could not embark on with only your future spouse. But, they are also not typical of trips one might take with his best friend. Rather, these special trips require a future spouse and a best friend. No one wants to be a third wheel though, so the best friend must have a companion as well.

Exactly what sort of trip has such requirements? I'm not certain.

Want to know who you might marry in the future? Ask Nathan Franklin because if he can find a way to make it work for him, he can find a way to make it work for you.

2 Comments:

At 5:07 PM, Blogger Unknown said...

this post is gold, my friend. good work.

 
At 2:08 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

While I am not going to deny that such an agendy may exist, it should be mentioned that said agenda did not develop until AFTER Jenny showed interest in Mr. Bergl and I realized the possibilities.

 

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